For the last 7 days
I have been feeding you fat lazy bastards breakfast.
Today is your last meal.
Today is your last meal.
It's Brunch day and Merkin day.
Don't know what a Merkin is?
Well kids, a Merkin is a Pubic Wig.
Photos follow.
(I do work hard for your viewing pleasure,
tips are welcome and will be taken -
they are included on your bill).
Now then, today I'm having eggs benedict.
You all can help yourselves to the grab and go items.
Don't get fucking crumbs on my blog
or you'll spend the day cleaning it.
Need I remind you that
I'm fucking brilliant?
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Eggs Benedict.
Scrumpdillyiscious.
The best goddamn french pastry on the planet.
If you have not had this,
you have missed out on something truly fanfuckingtastic.
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Croissants
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Strawberry Crepes
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Bagel Assortment
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Pastry Plethera
Ok then, now that you have your grab and go food,
its time to
Meet the Merkins.
And a happy family they are.
The first item is just a mildly amusing ad for Merkins.
The first item is just a mildly amusing ad for Merkins.
I'm not real sure why they use straw.
Sounds completely idiotic to me.
Maybe people can grow extra long pubic hair
and then donate it to a pubic hair charity.
It's my idea.
If there is any profit in this idea, thats mine too.
Hot Damn...I AM fucking brilliant.
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The Bullseye Merkin
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The Feathered Merkin
With an Ugly Floral Merkin
(Might I say, Ewwww..)
The Natural Heart Merkin
The Sparkly Heart Merkin
The Man's Merkin.
Circular?
Someone explain that to me huh?
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(Insert Lesbian comments here.)
The Patriotic British Merkin
The Don't Ask Me What This Is Merkin
The Small Heart Merkin
The Purple Wedding Day Surprise Merkin
The Runlikehellfromthat Merkin
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The scarylameassbitchmotherfuckingwhatinthehellisthat Merkin.
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The scarylameassbitchmotherfuckingwhatinthehellisthat Merkin.
I've enjoyed the comments and the visits.
Any suggestions for next weeks topic are welcome.
Might not be paid attention to but are welcome just the same.
So I leave you with this parting reminder.
I'm
Fucking
Brilliant.
And don't you forget it.
Public Service Announcement: Merkins were invented 4 bazillon quatillion years ago for prostitutes to wear over their nether regions to hide the syphlitic lesions and gonorrheal scars which were just a normal job hazard back in the day.
2 Snappy Comebacks:
I must agree. You - loe me - are brilliant. But you already know it just like I do.
It too bad others don't realize the same Dr. Zibbs - thats why its our job to repeatedly remind them.
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