Sad Little Fuckers, Aren't They?

I've got this Feedjit thingamabob on my blog. It tells me when you all visited, where you visited from, and how you got here - direct link, photo search, google phrase/word search, etc.

The current top link that people visit from is 2008 Weblog Awards - Yes my dear sweet children, yours truly was a finalist in the "Best New Blog" category. Eat your little motherfucking hearts out.

The top photo search that brings the world to my blog is for "Merkins." (See Sunday Brunch and Pubic Decor)

I now will share with you, the top "phrases/words" that bring people to my fucking blog when they do a google search.

Ready?

1. "Want Fuck."
2. "Fuck fingers."
3. "Famous fuckups."
4. "Fuck off and die."
5. "Fucked up."
6. "Fuck you."
7. "Fuck it."
8. "Fuck me."

You'll notice of course that each one contains the word fuck.

My goal was to get everyone to use the word fuck more often.

My work here is done.

Yeah Fuck You...I'm Not Dead Yet

I was away from the blogworld again,

participating in a myriad of family events

that lead to the day of my son-in-laws departure

for Afghanistan

with the USMC.

He left last week.

Semper Fi.

~~~~~~~~

Here is a synopsis of that time:

Community Picnic with Main Course being roast pig.

The neighbors took their pot-belly pig to said pig-pickin.

Yes, the pig ate pig.

A photo of my grandson and son-in-law playing during the community picnic.

Same son-in-law, family going-away-party, ice cream cake frosting on face.

Makes you feel just a bit safer, huh?
One of our dogs, Nala, partaking of a massive bone.

Meet my granddaughter, Harlo.

She is still being processed.

She is due to arrive in early August.

Son-in-laws wife,

grandson's mother,

granddaughter's mother,

and my oldest baby.

~~~~~~~~~

For all of you who hoped it, wished it, and prayed for it,

Fuck you, I'm still here and didn't die.

~~~~~~~~

I'm still fucking brilliant as well.

Lest any of you forget.

Life's Little Fucking Pieces of Reality

This man is my son-in-law.

This photo was taken 3 months ago

On his 22nd birthday.

In less than 60 days

He will be in Afghanistan.

Between now and then, my daughter and son-in-law need to buy a home, move into it, write their wills, and make arrangments 'just in case,' amongst many other things.

My daughter will be giving birth to their second child in August. Her husband's tour of duty in Afghanistan will be a minimum of 10 months, so he will miss the majority of the pregnancy, the delivery and the first few months of his child's life.

US Marines give up alot to serve their country.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I offer no humor in my 'humor blog' today.

I only ask that you think kindly of our soldiers and wish them well.

They Serve to Live

And Live to Serve.

~~~~~

Semper Fi

Babies and Hoes, Thats What Its All About!

I trolled the internet, hoping to find something with the word "fuck" in it, regarding Daylight Savings Time (which for you non-americans, happens today in the US). I emerge victorious, as usual, because once again, I am fucking brilliant.


I also happen to have learned something new from these images regarding the time change, and it is my duty as a good American to inform you of the same.


I hope you find these as amusing as I do!

I hope you all have a marvelous fucking day.

Or a day of fucking marvelously.

Your choice.

People Are Bastards

This is what we do to our dog when we are bored.

We are bastards you see.

And we love it.

Fuck Responsibility, I Want to Dance Like a White Girl

Its Friday. The day is g-o-r-g-e-o-u-s. Its 11 AM and beautiful outside.

Today is NOT a good day to be a grown up, thats for damn sure.

I want to be a kid again.

Care to Join Me??

I want to play Red Rover all day and Kick the Can all night.

I want to drink grape soda pop and then laugh until it comes out of my nose.

I want to eat a tuna sandwich with potato chips on it or put Doritos on a hamburger.

I want to walk barefoot in the gutters after a pouring rain, looking for earthworms.

I want to build a tree house...for girls only of course....

and then throw water balloons at all the boys.

I want a candy necklace...and a sticky neck. (You know what I mean.)

I want a gigantic pixie stick....a pure sugar shooter...and I want to savor it for hours.

I want to be the passenger, sitting backwards, on a banana seat bike,

flying down hills at the speed of light!

I want to make my own skateboard - from an old roller skate

(the kind you used to use a key with)....

and then roll down hills over and over, trying not to crash.

I want to play hop scotch, jumprope, and klackers (remember those?)

I want to do a few running swan dives off the high diving board.

I want to make homemade popcorn balls and homemade chex mix.

I want to have a slumber party and play truth or dare

and then call the radio station

and dedicate a song to someone I secretly like.

I want to play some Three Dog Night,

some Mamas and the Papas,

some Dr. Hook,

and some Neil Sedaka.....

I want to dance like a white girl

in my underwear

while singing into my hairbrush

and dreaming about

what I'll be like when I'm a grown up.

Fuck Responsibility people...

lets all play Hookie today and be kids again.

Sigh.

My Little Stud Muffin (My One Nice Day This Month)

I have always heard the stories about how wonderful being a grandparent is.

Well, let me tell you, the stories don't hold a candle to reality.

I don't have to worry about schedules.

I don't have to worry about naps.

We play or eat when we want to.

I'm not wondering if I'll be able to afford clothing, diapers, toys....

there is no stress over bills.

We simply play.

And smile.

And giggle.

And laugh.

And cuddle.

And play some more.

Grandmas are for treats and chocolate milk and noisy toys.

We are for messy foods, silly outfits, silly songs,

and lots of the"Noggin" Channel.

He makes me more patient, softer, more gentle, kinder and happier.

He doesnt care what I do, who I know, or what I think.

He just knows I'm grandma and I'm fun and safe and warm.

Life doesn't get any better than this.

~~~~

Well hold on, it will.

My second grandchild is due in August.
Somedays, I can hardly wait!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Sometimes I think this little guy looks like Heath Ledger.

I must have said that out loud to people 100 times.

That was before I realized

that my little stud muffin

was born the very day that Heath died.

Coincidence?

~~~~~~~~

Photo Credits: Sher Hilliard Photography