Tuesday, October 14

Tuesday Breakfast and Penises

Why would anyone in their right mind
have a fucking hangover on a tuesday morning?
Shhhhhh.
Just bring me coffee and keep it coming.
Shut up and eat your hot cereal. (Photos follow.)
Gratuituous penis shots follow.
~~~~~~
Coffee...mmmmm
Without coffee I might not be brilliant.
Obviously I have a hangover,
because we all know that
I'm always fucking brilliant.

Oatmeal.
I do not like oatmeal.
Nope. Just don't like it.



Rice Pudding.
I don't understand the concept of cold rice in a pretty glass.
I'm not eating it.

Thank the gods, more coffee.
Bring me cream and sugar dammit.
Preferably Vanilla Caramel cream or Amaretto cream.
Just shut up and do it.

Autumn Porridge.
Looks like shitty oatmeal to me.
Nope, not eating it.

Cream of Wheat
This stuff is crap.
Not eating this either
I hate hot cereals.
Hate em.
And You cannot make me like them.

More Coffee, still minus the flavored cream.
As soon as my hangover is gone,
I'm gonna need to kick someones perky ass.
Any volunteers??

Gratuituous penis photos follow.
Pretty little things, aren't they?

The Bull Penis
Its just begging for a leash isn't it?


Mr. Elephant Man
They even pulled back his foreskin and painted underneath.
Go on, look closer. You can see it.



A Complete Moron.
Don't fucking argue with me,
look at him for fucks sake.


The Possessed Penis.


And last but simply not least,
some woman (or is it a man?) with a penis through a pierced ear hole
which apparently was gauged to fit a small penis.
At least he shaves.
We like smooth penises don't we!

I'm not even gonna fucking ask.

Can I have another coffee please?
I need one more coffee to be my normal fucking brilliant self.
My people need me.
Waiter?

3 Snappy Comebacks:

Catherinette Singleton said...

It's not a hangover, it's the cocktail flu. And it's not your fault, you were clearly over served.

rd said...

after seeing 'spidey' i'm kind of off breakfast for the time being.

although...

for some reason vienna sausage seems do-able for lunch.

rd said...

and rice pudding rules! with raisins. gotta be raisins or i throw a nelly fit.